You see a hot girl, and immediately, your heart drops. Your chest tightens and you don’t know what to do. You start going into fight or flight over some pussy. Excuses flood in. You’re frozen in place.
You’re no better than a deer in headlights. It’s like that moment when you’re jacking off in the bathroom and you hear the door knob turn as your mom walks in… yeah and we’re not talking step mom bro… You want to talk to her, but you have no idea what to say… and just like that, a few seconds later she’s gone.
Never to be seen again. Let’s have a moment of silence for all of our fallen brothers, paralayzed by too pussy to approach syndrome. So I get this question all the time.
And the funny thing is that this is kind of a bullshit question. This focus on what to say is a distraction from actually doing the approach. It’s an excuse. Think about it, when you say to yourself, “I can’t approach that girl because I don’t know what to say.”, you’ve already decided that you’re not going to approach that girl.
And your convenient excuse is that you don’t know what to say. You’re searching for reasons to not do the approach. On the other hand, if you had decided I’m going to approach that girl, the specifics of what you say wouldn’t matter because you will have already made the internal decision to go up and approach her.
The first thing you want to do before even focusing on what to say, is you want to decide in your head, “yes I want to approach that girl, and I’m going to approach that girl.” Once you commit to this in your mind, what to say doesn’t even cross your mind until you’re already in front of the girl.
Now, if you’re still nervous that’s OK. Just accept the feeling, but proceed anyways.
Knowing what to say can help alleviate some of the nervousness that comes with the approach AND it might make some guys feel more confident. So for this reason, you can have a few pre-made lines that you lean on in case you go up and your mind goes totally blank but they shouldn’t be what you rely on. Premade lines should just be a backup.
The simplest line you can use is to just go up and simply say, “Hi, I’m Zeus.” and by that I don’t mean tell the girl your name is Zeus, you’d obviously substitute your own name in there.
I know I’m a god and i’m over here speaking the gospel, but you still have to take what I say with some common sense and a grain of salt. Here are some more pre-made lines you can use: Hi, you’re cute. I wanted to come meet you.
Hi, we haven’t met yet, I’m Zeus Excuse me, what’s your name? Hi, I’m here to flirt with you until I see if we’re compatible. If you wanted to be less direct. You could ask for directions somewhere or for an opinion, and say things like: Excuse me, where’s the best place to get coffee around here? Do you think my outfit is too casual?
Things like this can be good because they start things off more natural and you can escalate it to a romantic context later in the conversation.
Any time I find myself not knowing what to say or do in a situation with a girl, I like to keep in mind the phrase, “just be friendly.” Be normal, be friendly, be chatty. That completely encompasses the core of what you need to know when approaching girls and starting conversations that lead to attraction. Especially if you’re a younger guy in a college or school setting, this goes such a long way.
In any situation where there’s a closed community of people, nobody will think it’s weird if you just introduce yourself by saying, “Hi, I’m Zeus.” I noticed that closed community settings are some of the best places to meet girls, so places like school, the gym, people who live in your neighborhood, and even if you were on vacation and staying at the same hotel.
One of my college roommates used to ABSOLUTELY crush it in daygame by using the line, “Excuse me, what’s your name?” That’s literally it. He got laid the most out of everyone else I knew in my university, and it was because he was able to approach so many girls in class, outside of class, on the bus, at the gym, and everywhere he went.
He was able to get girls numbers and set up dates for later on while just going about his day, simply because he understood that a closed community setting built a strong level of comfort and non-weirdness when it comes to approaching.
Not only that, but he also had a strong understanding of what I’m about to tell you. In all my years of teaching guys how to get girls, this is perhaps one of my most profound discoveries. Most guys that girls encounter are creeps, so being simply normal, and socially aware immediately puts you leagues ahead of these guys so you have very little competition. Creepy guys are all the way at the bottom at a zero, and 90% of guys are creepy and uncalibrated around girls.
Once you’re simply just normal and non-creepy, you’re bumped all the way to a 7. And if you’re a high value, guy with excellent game, you’re at a 10. There’s not a HUGE difference between being a normal, non-creep, and being a pussymagnet dating god like me. The biggest jump and change in results comes from being a non-creep to normal. Burn this concept into your mind.
When first learning game, it’s totally OK to be normal even if you’re not really flirting as long are you’re not creepy because that will still put you ahead of 90% of guys. The hard part is being able to control your nerves and keep your head on straight when you’re in an interaction with a girl so you can actually act normal and not be so nervous that you start being creepy and socially awkward and uncalibrated. Learning to turn off and deal with the nervousness so you can just act like your normal self is the hardest part and it’s what will get you laid.